You’re talking to the new cutie in your class when out of nowhere he or she asks you to go to the stairwell to hook up. You say no, and the new cutie—who’s starting to look a lot less cute to you—replies, “Come on, I know what people like you do.”

“People like me? What does that mean?” you ask.

“You have a tongue ring and a tramp stamp; don’t tell me you aren’t a whore.”

You’re shocked, and all you can do is get up and walk away. And you wonder, Is that really what people think of me? You find one of your friends and ask “Do I look like a whore?” Your friend, confused, says, “No, what does a whore even look like?”

People sometimes refer to someone they’ve never met as a whore just by looking at them. Unfortunately, clothing and accessories, such as tongue rings, tattoos on your lower back and jelly bracelets, are sometimes enough for people to make assumptions about you sexually, and what your values are. Who knew that getting a piercing or tattoo would make people think badly about you?

Sadly, some people will judge you based on what you are wearing. But how can you get around this? Well, there’s no way to stop people from judging you, but you can take steps to stop it from affecting you. After having someone call me a whore, I was very upset. But later that day, I looked myself in the mirror, stood up straight and repeated to myself out loud, “I am beautiful, and I will not let what people think about me affect the way I see myself.”

Keep in mind that sometimes when people are insecure with themselves, they put others down. So, regardless of what someone calls you, have confidence in yourself and the choices you make about what you wear and what you do. After all, it’s your life, your body and, ultimately, your decision.

—Colleen Tierney, 17, Staff Writer

I was talking with some of my friends about MTV’s Teen Mom a few weeks ago, and one of them said, “They’re all whores.” My friend wasn’t calling the guys who the girls had sex with whores, just the girls—not that anyone deserves to be called a whore. I was really surprised and upset that my friend said this.

Why is it that if you’re a teen mother you’re a whore? I don’t hear people calling 20-something-year-old mothers whores, even though they have unplanned pregnancies too. People—teens and adults—make mistakes and birth control fails. But that doesn’t mean you’re a whore, and it doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. I don’t look at any of the girls on Teen Mom as whores or sluts. So, they have kids? So, they’re young? So, what?

Being a parent is the most difficult job in the world, especially when you’re young and not ready to take care of a baby. Why say hurtful things about young mothers who are in a really difficult situation?

People may use words like “whore” because they are insecure and want to feel better about themselves by putting someone else—a girl or woman—down. It would make a big difference if people spent half the time they spend talking bad about other people doing something good, like making sure teens get the information they need to help prevent unplanned pregnancies.

—Kait Hamilton, 17, Staff Writer

Do you know anyone who has come to school naked? Probably not, but maybe you do know people at your school who have been seen naked because they’ve sexted—shared nude photos or videos of themselves via text or online. Many teens believe that the only person viewing the message is the person they send it to, however, with the click of a button, the sext can easily be shared with many others. Although it may seem harmless, there can be negative consequences for sexting. Who would want a college admissions officer or potential employer to make a decision about you after seeing your nude photo or video online? And even worse, who wants to have a criminal record for the possession or distribution of child porn just because you have a nude pic of your partner on your phone? (This has actually happened in several states.)

Once a sext is sent, there’s no way to take it back, and it is no longer private. Each year teens are fully exposed to their friends, classmates and lots of other people because of sexting. Think before sexting. More than a quarter of 14-to 24-year-olds have received naked photos or videos via text or online, according to an Associated Press-MTV poll. Is sexting really worth risking, not only being completely revealed, but a criminal record? Ponder this public service announcement and let us know what you think.

—Chelsea Sirico, 17, Staff Writer

Girls can wear dresses or pants. Right? Apparently not at prom. Sex, Etc. magazine recently reported that a 17-year-old girl in Indiana wanted to express her gender by wearing a tuxedo to prom. She was denied this right, because her school’s dress code required girls to wear dresses to prom. The American Civil Liberties Union filed a lawsuit that resulted in the elimination of clothing restrictions based on sex.

You might be quick to blow this off as a rare occurrence, but issues like this come up more than you would think. At all-male, Morehouse College in Atlanta, GA, there’s a new “Appropriate Attire Policy” that prohibits students from carrying purses or wearing dresses, makeup or high heels. A few weeks ago in Wesson, MS, a female student wore a tuxedo in her school picture, but the school would not allow her photograph to be published in the yearbook.

It is very discouraging that so many people and institutions are not accepting or understanding of how people choose to express their feelings of being male or female. Sadly, people often do not approve of things that they are not used to. There are many people in the world whose gender expression does not match our expectations of how guys or girls should act or dress. If we keep educating people and exposing them to the different ways that people choose to express their gender, perhaps we can eliminate the kind of discrimination these students faced.

-Melanie Johnson, 17, Staff Writer

This past weekend, teens celebrated Halloween—the “sweetest” time of year with candy, mischief, scary spirits—and sexy costumes?!

For some teen girls, Halloween is a fun, harmless opportunity to take exciting risks. From “naughty schoolgirls” to “sexy cops,” girls dressed up in provocative outfits to flaunt their wild sides and show off their bodies. Teens who normally aren’t all caught up in being sexy chose to wear revealing costumes that were tinier, tighter and shorter than ever.

A recent article from the campus newspaper at Northwestern University taught readers how to “skankify yourself this Halloween” with tips and rules. As Cady from Mean Girls has said, “Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.” Hmmm…so the point of Halloween is to look like skanks and wear as little as possible? Don’t get me wrong, being able to comfortably express our sexy sides and explore personal boundaries can be incredibly empowering. But when does it go too far?

Check out this photo of Audrina Patridge in a genie costume at her recent Halloween party. “Audrina Patridge: Making Every Man’s Wish Come True” reads the headline from a celebrity gossip blog. The headline seems to suggest that the purpose of dressing up is to please others—especially men—rather than ourselves. Why isn’t there a picture of a male celebrity “making everyone’s wish come true” with his costume? What’s up with the double standard?

It’s fine to try out what it’s like to be sexy. But in today’s highly sexualized culture, where women are all too often valued only for their sex appeal, we’ve got to remember there’s a lot more to girls and women than just being sexy.

—Cynthia Lam, 16, Staff Writer