We get lots of e-mails from teens describing their symptoms to us, but it’s impossible to make a diagnosis over the Internet.

Basically, if you had vaginal, oral or anal sex and didn’t use a fresh latex or polyurethane condom or dental dam with each act, you could have been exposed to an STD. There’s one way of knowing for sure whether you have an STD: Get tested. Check out our Get Tested page to find a clinic. And find out how to talk to your partner here.

If you do end up testing positive for an STD, know that you are not alone. It can be helpful to get more information about it so you can know the facts before you talk to anyone else about it. Your doctor, a family planning counselor or the person that tested you can often be a good person to talk to about any questions you have. Sometimes people need time to get used to the news themselves before they feel comfortable talking about it with another person.

Some people get really nervous thinking about talking to a partner about an STD diagnosis. They might be afraid that their partner will be upset, dump them, say mean things to them or even go around telling other people. Even if you’re nervous, it’s really important to talk with your partner or partners about your diagnosis. If you have an STD, there is a chance that they have it too, so it’s important for your partner to be tested. If only one person in a sexual partnership is treated, you can get re-infected right away by the partner who was not treated.

Regardless of the kind of STD you have, practicing safer sex can help minimize the risk of transmitting it to a partner or getting re-infected. Talking with a partner about an STD diagnosis is something that is usually best done in a non-sexual situation. In other words, don’t wait to mention it until the clothes are flying off! You can let your partner know that you got tested and what the results are. It might help to have some information about the STD to share with your partner, including how to reduce the risk of transmission. 

Safety is important. You’re the expert on your own situation, so you probably have an idea of whether it is safe to share this information with your partner. If you feel that you would be physically unsafe if you shared your STD status with a partner, you may be able to get support doing so. Talk with your doctor or clinic staff about whether they might be able to help inform partners that you tested positive for an STD.

If you feel unsafe in your relationship, you can also get support from the National Teen Dating Abuse Hotline, at 1-866-331-9474 (TTY: 1-866-331-8453), or online via peer advocate instant messenger support at loveisrespect.org.