“It's true that some guys want to just have sex, but it's…a stereotype [that gets] put on us all.”
—Devin, 16, CO
I'm a little under average size. Will my penis be too small to please a partner?
First of all, penis size is a number one worry among guys. Second, your penis perfectly normal. Penises come in different sizes, different shapes. When flaccid (soft), penises can be anywhere from an inch to several inches. When erect, all these different-sized penises tend to "even out" with each other. So the locker room is not the best place to compare penis size because the guy with the biggest flaccid penis may not have the biggest erection.
The other thing to keep in mind is that, as a teen, you are not done growing yet, so your penis may still not yet have reached its full adult size. It'll save you plenty of worrying if you stop comparing yourself to others during your teen years because people develop at different rates.
What's more important for you to understand, though, is that penis size doesn't really matter when it comes to sex. There are mega myths about the importance of penis size which is why a lot of guys grow up learning to measure their masculinity by the size of their penis. (You know, you hear people jokingly say things like, "It's so big I can barely get it through the door," and stuff like that.) This is all pretty much baloney and has nothing at all to do with how sex works.
For guys who are attracted to women: The truth is that the vagina is elastic (it has to be in order for babies to be born). So a woman's vagina can tightly accommodate a big or a small penis (in fact, it can tightly accommodate something as small as a finger). Also, most of the nerve endings a woman has in her vagina are concentrated at the entrance. So extra penis length won't necessarily do that much in terms of giving a woman pleasure. And even more importantly, the most important cluster of nerve endings for women are in her clitoris, and you don't need a penis at all to find it.
For guys who are attracted to men: The truth is that giving pleasure to a man doesn't require a large penis either. A large penis isn't necessary to reach the "male g-spot," the prostate. The prostate lies within a finger's reach inside the anus. So extra penis length won't necessarily do that much in terms of giving a man pleasure. And many gay men prefer oral sex or mutual masturbation to anal sex.
But maybe most important -- sex isn't about competition (who's bigger, who's better); sex is about sharing communicating, intimacy and pleasure. So the best lover is not the guy who has the biggest "equipment." The best lover is the guy who is best at communicating with his partner. He finds out what his partner's feelings are and shares his feelings. He learns how his partner likes to be touched (and what he or she doesn't like). And he shares with his partner what he likes and doesn't.
It's not the size of your penis that makes you a "real man" or a good or bad lover, it's how you think and how act.
The other thing to keep in mind is that, as a teen, you are not done growing yet, so your penis may still not yet have reached its full adult size. It'll save you plenty of worrying if you stop comparing yourself to others during your teen years because people develop at different rates.
What's more important for you to understand, though, is that penis size doesn't really matter when it comes to sex. There are mega myths about the importance of penis size which is why a lot of guys grow up learning to measure their masculinity by the size of their penis. (You know, you hear people jokingly say things like, "It's so big I can barely get it through the door," and stuff like that.) This is all pretty much baloney and has nothing at all to do with how sex works.
For guys who are attracted to women: The truth is that the vagina is elastic (it has to be in order for babies to be born). So a woman's vagina can tightly accommodate a big or a small penis (in fact, it can tightly accommodate something as small as a finger). Also, most of the nerve endings a woman has in her vagina are concentrated at the entrance. So extra penis length won't necessarily do that much in terms of giving a woman pleasure. And even more importantly, the most important cluster of nerve endings for women are in her clitoris, and you don't need a penis at all to find it.
For guys who are attracted to men: The truth is that giving pleasure to a man doesn't require a large penis either. A large penis isn't necessary to reach the "male g-spot," the prostate. The prostate lies within a finger's reach inside the anus. So extra penis length won't necessarily do that much in terms of giving a man pleasure. And many gay men prefer oral sex or mutual masturbation to anal sex.
But maybe most important -- sex isn't about competition (who's bigger, who's better); sex is about sharing communicating, intimacy and pleasure. So the best lover is not the guy who has the biggest "equipment." The best lover is the guy who is best at communicating with his partner. He finds out what his partner's feelings are and shares his feelings. He learns how his partner likes to be touched (and what he or she doesn't like). And he shares with his partner what he likes and doesn't.
It's not the size of your penis that makes you a "real man" or a good or bad lover, it's how you think and how act.
 |
 |
 |
 |
Your Comments
Its OK
Posted by: theritegirl on Oct 26th, 2008 10:41pm
Take if from another girl, the size of your penises are not
as important as how you use them. And just because large
penises are shown all over the internet and in porn videos
doesn't mean that is what we have to have. When my friends
and I talk about penis size or the size of their boyfriends
we usually don't mind if a guy is a little on the big side
but it is not a requirement. Society shows us big erect
penises and that a guy has to look like that to please a
girl but that is not true.
not just about looks!!!
Posted by: Juggalo on Aug 23rd, 2008 12:14am
O.k,I understand the experts saying "its not all about size
when pleasing your partner!" I have what I think to be a
little under the average penis size,and I wouldn't mind a
bigger penis! It isn't because of pleasing my mate,its a
sense of self confidence,and higher self esteem! My mate and
I enjoy pleasurable sex as is...but I still wouldn't mind
about a 8 or 9 inch penis just because of the confidence it
would give me!!!!
Omg
Posted by: FL_Gurl3494 on Aug 13th, 2008 2:21am
Ok Take It From A Girl...A Penis Is a Penis Alot Of Girls
Say Size Is A Big Thing But When It Comes Down To It As Long
As There Getting Some What Does It Matter How Big/Small It
Is I Say Work With What You Got & If They Dont Like It There
Not The One For You...!
it doesnt matter
Posted by: iloveBlake on Feb 21st, 2008 10:27pm
It doesnt matter what size you are just as long as you know
how to use it and your partner wont care! trust me :)
Yeah!
Posted by: spaceboy3 on Jan 17th, 2008 4:42pm
Thank you for putting those last two lines! Now only if more
people would understand that.
RE: Penis size
Posted by: DanR on Jan 11th, 2008 10:22am
Penises came in all different shapes, sizes and colors, so
there is no real "normal" penis. Penis size is a concern
for many guys, so you are not alone. For information on the
average penis size see this FAQ:
http://www.sexetc.org/faq/guys_health/931.
Penis size
Posted by: Parkes on Jan 10th, 2008 9:59pm
I have a 10 inch long penis when erect, is my penis size
normal?
You Must Be Logged In to Comment
Answer, Rutgers University © 2008. All Rights Reserved.
Developed by MSSG, Office of Information Technology
some girls like it better
Posted by: rain bo bree on Oct 28th, 2008 2:36pm
i actually don't like guys with big penises. it's not a
pleasurable as smaller ones. ALOT of my friends feel the
same way. take it from a girl, size NEVER matters when your
with the one you love.