I’m a 17-year-old guy from northern New York and I’ve decided to abstain from sexual intercourse. Here’s why.

Probably the most significant reason was the fear of AIDS or other incurable diseases. Yes, sex would be fun, but I don’t want to risk my life for it.

I personally have nothing against teenage sex, as long as condoms and other protection are used. But, as we all know, there is no 100 percent protection. There is always a risk—a risk I am not ready to take.

Photography by Dan Strange

When I tell people I’m a senior in high school and a virgin, they always ask me how I cope with the peer pressure to have sex. The whole peer pressure thing is overrated. When I tell girls that I’m not sexually active, they find it sexy. When I tell guys about my decision, most of them tell me they respect me for waiting. I’ve had many guys tell me that they wished they had waited. Their first time was either not as good as expected, or they didn’t use protection and are paying for it now.

One summer, I got very intimate with a girl, a very beautiful girl. We kissed and everything, but I told her I wouldn’t have sex. At first she was surprised, but then she said she really respected my choice. She had never heard of a guy stopping the action. She said that the girl always feels pressured by the guy. When I said that I didn’t want to have sex, the pressure was gone. We both felt more comfortable and got more intimate because we knew sex wasn’t going to be the next step.

Naturally, I have sexual urges, just like everyone else. There are many ways to deal—solo or mutual masturbation, necking, petting, fondling. You can use abstinence as a chance to explore your sexuality. Then, when you are ready for sex, you will be more aware of what turns you on.