During the summer of 2001, I was hanging out with an old friend from middle school. Kathy was 16 and a year older than me, and she had a car, which made hanging out with her that much better.

Kathy had transferred schools in 7th grade, so I hadn't seen her for a few years. By that summer, she had made a lot of new friends. Most of them hung out every weekend getting drunk and passing out. I didn't think much of it at the time.

At the beginning of the summer, Kathy introduced me to some of her new friends. I got along with them pretty well, especially this guy named Trevor. I'm not sure exactly what attracted me to him, but it didn't really matter. I liked him.

Trevor and I made out drunk at parties a few times. We'd actually never kissed or made out sober—not even once. At that time of my life, I found myself drunk almost every weekend, making out with random people, flashing entire households of people. I was out of control.

One weekend, four of us decided it would be fun to go camping and, of course, bring alcohol. The four of us consisted of Trevor; Trevor's best friend, Mike; Mike's girlfriend, Leah; and me. I told my dad that I was going to my mom's house for the weekend (my parents are divorced).

My mom said it was fine if I went, as long as I was "safe," this included safe as in common sense and safe as in safe sex. Even though I was a virgin, my mom handed me a condom. I rolled my eyes, because I had no intention of losing my virginity. I remember her saying, "What? I just don't want you to become a statistic." I shoved the condom in my back pocket and proceeded on the trip.

We drove to a very secluded camping place. It was already dark by the time we arrived, so naturally we started a campfire. At this point, Trevor and Mike had already started mixing drinks: hard-alcohol drinks. I was pretty gone after one.

Trevor and I followed our usual course and began to make out, which eventually led to claiming one of the two tents as our own. (Originally one tent was for the girls and one tent was for the guys.) We talked or mumbled briefly about having sex. We were both so drunk we thought it was a good idea.

We started taking off our clothes and he began kissing my neck. He then lay on top of me and inserted himself into me. It was the most painful experience I had had in a really long time. No spit, no lubricant, no nothing. This was his second time having sex, so I let him lead.

Eventually I got used to it and forgot about the pain. At one point, the condom slipped off him and I flipped out, because I was really paranoid about getting pregnant, so I made him stop. I was really tired, so I started to go to sleep. Next thing I realized, we were having sex again. Again, I flipped out, because we weren't using a condom.

The next morning, I woke up next to him feeling very confused. We didn't talk about it at all that day or on the ride home. We actually haven't ever talked about it. He acts as if we never even slept together.

I liked Trevor, but I would've never had sex with him if I had been sober. I felt and still feel very used and disappointed. I am so lucky that I didn't get pregnant or a sexually transmitted infection, because making choices like the ones I did often come with consequences.

If you're going to drink or have sex for the first time, do it responsibly, because you could end up making a choice or mistake that could change your life forever. I wish I had never lost my virginity the way I did, but you learn from both your own and others' mistakes.

National correspondent Zoe, 18, lives in Vancouver, Washington.

Editors' Note: Want more information about having sex for the first time? Check out our "Deciding about Sex" section. To learn about condoms, click here.