We get over 60,000 visitors to our site each day, most of them teens who are trying to get correct answers to their most pressing sexual concerns. I compiled the most frequently asked questions and found that many of them are based on common societal myths. I know lots of young people struggle with these issues mainly because they don't always have access to real answers. I believe, though, that accurate information is the only way to empower us as young people to make the best sexual choices for ourselves. So, here goes my attempt to set the record straight!

 

Pryde Brown Photography Natasha, 16

For girls, vaginal sex hurts.

Vaginal sex, in general, should not be painful. However, pain can be caused by the breaking of an intact hymen, which often happens the first time you have sex. Vaginal sex can also hurt if a girl is not sexually aroused enough. Fluids produced from the vagina serve as a type of lubricant—let's call it mood juice—and that makes the vaginal area moist and easier to enter. If you are not relaxed, no special mood juice is released, and sex can hurt. Consider using a water-based lubricant, if foreplay doesn't help.

A penis has to be a certain size in order to satisfy a partner.
Some guys with large penises do not know how to please their partners, and some guys with smaller penises take the time to really learn what their partner wants. Bigger isn't always better, but knowledge is always king!

Everyone is having anal sex.
Some people have anal sex, some people don't. For the people who do have anal sex, always use lubricated condoms for anal intercourse. And NEVER insert the penis into the vagina directly after anal sex. Be sure to wash it first or change the condom.

Girls' private parts are nasty and smelly.
Now ladies, we are constantly tricked into thinking that a certain part of our bodies is so nasty. Whenever we walk into stores, we are bombarded with a variety of products to help us smell better and feel cleaner. The vagina, however, is actually very clean and produces a daily discharge to flush out harmful bacteria on its own. Feminine hygiene products, such as douches, are not good for you, can cause irritation and make you more prone to infections. Knowing what you normally smell like will help you notice any changes that may require medical attention.

Sex should last a certain amount of time.
Pornography and movies always want you to believe that men can go on endlessly like the Energizer bunny and that women can cum at the snap of a finger. How long sex lasts, though, varies. However, if you think you are coming too quickly, you can masturbate before having sex with your partner, or when you feel yourself coming, stop until you regain control.  If you think you are not coming quickly enough, just try to relax and enjoy the journey.  It's important to get to the station, but the train ride is more than half the fun. 
 
Masturbation is harmful. And anyway, girls don't masturbate.
It is a popular misconception that if men masturbate too often, they will eventually run out of sperm. This is not true at all. Masturbation is perfectly normal and natural. As a matter of fact, many females masturbate on a regular basis and no damage is caused. However, ladies, if you insert an object (or even a finger) in your vagina, make sure to clean it first.   

Oral sex isn't really sex.
Oral sex is really sex. To some people, oral sex is not as personal as actual intercourse, and to some people, it is more personal. Either way, people who think that oral sex isn't sex fail to realize you can still get a sexually transmitted disease if you don't use protection.
 
You're only a virgin, if you don't have vaginal sex.
What about the people who have same sex relationships? Does that mean that they will be virgins forever because they never have vaginal sex? The word virginity is vague and all depends on the person—their morals, values and personal views.

It's next to impossible for a girl to have an orgasm.
Females tend to need more time to have an orgasm—not because anything is wrong, but because girls usually need to have their clitorises stimulated in order to cum. Unfortunately, the clitoris isn't directly stimulated through vaginal intercourse. Most girls (and guys) don't know this, so a lot of girls leave sexual encounters thinking that something is wrong with them.  Practice getting to know your body on your own, so you can learn what feels good to you. Then you can help teach a partner how to please you.

Uncircumcised guys have gross penises and don't experience the same kind of pleasure as circumcised guys. Many guys have uncircumcised penises, and they're just as beautiful as ones that have had the flap of skin removed from the head of the penis. Plus, they both function and experience pleasure the same way. The right partner will accept a guy—foreskin or not— just the way he is.

Editors' Note: To learn more about any of these myths check out the topic areas, like Girls' Health, Guys' Health and Sex. Want to add your own myths? Tell us about them below in the comments section.